1: Wonder Wall

Chapter 1:

Wonder Wall

The raspy voice of Joe Walsh singing about how life had been good to him screeched loudly from a cell phone that sat beside a bed which lay inside an overly small… and poorly decorated… studio… apartment in the shitty section… of Miami Beach. The smell of two-day-old dishes “soaking” in the sink filled the tiny room with the immediate reminder of how life had not been as good to Mr. Ellis Matthews as it had to Mr Walsh.

“I gotta change that god damn song.”

Ellis opened his eyes to the same dull heart shaped water stain with the crack through its center that resided above his bed for the last four years. A wave of heat washed over him along with that familiar sense of failure and regret.

The chorus hit the part about how good life could be.

“Ya ya ya Joe, I got it.”

Ellis moaned arching his back and blindly reached for the phone to silence the classic rockers gloating about how much better his life was than his. Finding it he quickly fantasized about hitting snooze and writing the day off. Nope, not today. Today was Tuesday and not only did that mean tacos at lunch it also meant a chance bump into Ali, his secret crush which he was horribly sheepish around. The company had chosen Tuesday for its weekly review where everyone gets together and shares the case studies they are working on. Ali, that girl at work who everyone had a crush on but none had the balls to do anything about, was always the center of attention. A smile crept across his face at imagining what she might be wearing today just before “snooze back up alarm” went off reminded Ellis again that his life sucked.

He huffed, hit the cancel button, found his glasses and started his robotic schedule all over again like so many times before. Breathing in the smell of mediocrity and those two day old dishes he loudly exhaled disappointment and began.

1. Roll through sweat soaked sheets and swing feet to the clumpy brown shag carpet you bought for 4.99 at dollar general. Turn on music to get ready

He did as he remembered.

2. Notice above zero refrigerator within pissing distance, how underwhelming your apartment and life still are, and that your still out of shape and underdeveloped in life.

Perfectly. “Guess My Name” toned in improving the mood ever slightly.

3. Stand up, scratch ass and pray there is no pain in the knee you twisted a years ago.

He did, he done and he didn’t have his prayers answered as life played out accordingly and to his expectations.

“Jesus.”

He muttered to himself in the various forms of blasphemy like he did each morning. Today it was Jesus that was the blunt of his anger.

4. Hobble your 240lb six foot ass into the bathroom and get ready for work.

This is where his routine tended to vary.

Maybe shit - shower - shave or maybe just shave - shower. Occasionally not a shower but, surely never any combination that ended in shit.

He was a closet germaphobe trapped inside a virologist’s body who worked for the largest private research center on the east coast, “Eden”. This meant he was surrounded daily by every natural and genetically modified microscopic killer in the world and it was his job to help develop defenses against them. A job he did mediocrely at best but with a lot of effort, on not touching anything.

Shit- shower - shave his typical routine it was.

Fast forward several depressing minutes later and Ellis found himself staring in the mirror during his shave wondering how he age 50 years in 33. His life wasn’t easy and the stress of growing up in foster care can age one swiftly. He did however manage a positive outlook and general humor about life when he could. He had too, he couldn't survive any other way.

The salt and pepper hairline of a fifty-year-old grew atop his skull. His pecs that used to be semi almost hard now showed no signs of definition or effort. Man scapping wasn’t even a consideration.

Yes, he had unraveled in the most marvelous of ways. But so what, he didn’t have anyone he needed to impress as he had been single for the last who knows how many years. He was happy to just imagine potential rather than act on it. His shyness tended to always prevent him from making a move or getting past the word almost.

His tighty whitys fit awkwardly around his body as he moved to the fridge saying a silent non-audible prayer to any god that might be listening. He prayed for anything past this door to be edible. Amen

He pulled the handle back and his basic brown eyes confirmed that yet another prayer went unanswered as expected.

He found a wasteland of half eaten pizza, most likely expired milk, the token Chinese take-out leftovers from who knows when, and brand new bottles of Natty Light Beer. It was a college students’ norm but a grown man’s embarrassment.

And you wonder why Ellis. He silently scolded himself.

Shaking his head, he grabbed a beer and closed the door.

“Cinnamon crunch and water it is.” With the up most disdain he made himself a heaping bowl of diabetes, cracked the beer open, and sat in a horrible posture.

5. Find people who are better than you are wish you were secretly them.

Bringing the spoon to his mouth he slowly meandered through the world of social media. The list was endless of the lives he wished were his.

- Mansions in tropical places with every kind of toy for any kind of boy

- Private jets with expensive champagne and even more expensive women

- Crazy adventures awaiting those who dared to explore their wild side and the courage to actually do it

The taste of water and the cinnamon crunch enforced the fact that those lifestyles weren't for him. Those are for lucky people.

“Im off to the show in a limo…”

Freak Nasty’s Da Dip came on perfectly as this was about the time Ellis needed that extra smile to keep going. He instantly smiled and began to try and dip that ended in brutal failure. Moving ten feet from the kitchen to the closet he continued.

Khaki pants size 36x32. Beige shirt size large. Brown shoes size 12. Brown socks and matching belt. It was a grownups uniform much like the ones he wore in grade school. The only difference was instead of nuns busting his knuckles he had dickhead bosses whipping his ass.

Silent profanities mumbled through the sides of his mouth as he finished looping the final lace of a subpar bow atop his shoe.

“It’s Tuesday man. Tuesday.”

Her reminded himself of the best free cafeteria tacos in the world and that blond little something which sat four seats to his left today. Maybe this was the day he’d talked to her?

The dip continued to play feverishly in the background.

Probably not was his inclination.

A PhD UM intern named Alice had caught everyone’s eye several months ago when she began interning at their business. Minus a very awkward cafeteria tray spill. infant of her Ellis never really had a formal introduction let alone an interaction with her ever. Just the gossiping with the other nerdy male colleagues at work about her level of attractiveness.

The future 45 minutes of potential interaction with this beauty that was all he needed to make the hardest parts of his morning pass by.

Disappointment flowed through his veins as he fingered the band aid he placed over the blemish on his neck that had picked the worst day to pop up. Life wasn’t his best friend and he knew it.

His phone buzzed on the counter with the Super Mario Brothers mushroom power up tone that eluded to an incoming text from the only person that ever texted him, Mean-Gene, his faithful side kick and only real friend. Eugene, his real name, resembled the stereotypical nerd in every movie ever made and had the voice to match. He and Ellis had forged a friendship over the past year since they were transferred into the same department, Defense.

They were the perfect sort of misfits who kinda got each other and accepted their roles in life. Plus, they were now known as the office’s biracial couple, Gene being of African decent and Ellis a basic English mix. He had guessed his heritage based on looks though not knowing his parents he couldn’t be sure.

Gene: Hey, hope you caught that show last night, it was crazy.

He was obliviously was referring to the new episode of Ancient Aliens which Ellis of course caught.

Ellis: Ya, it was pretty intense, I love that conspiracy type stuff.

Ellis reviewed they general plot line quickly in his head. Warfare, religion, biology…

Gene had a much more unhealthy obsession with the TV show which he constantly questioned Ellis on every chance he could.

Gene: Hey, its Tuesday!!

Oh this Tuesday situation at work was the one thing they both really looked forward to all week that didn’t involve a computer, TV or some sort of “i” whatever.

Gene: Tacos and Ali..

Both were equally awesome in their own right.

Realizing he was already late he ignored Genes last message and grabbed his keys glancing around the embarrassment of an apartment dying a little more inside. Ellis closed the door and shuffled his feet down the steps of his condo building.

The heat of the day nearly overtake him bringing an initial sweat to his clothing decreasing the energy “Da Dip” had generated. The familiar fragrance of exhaust and despair engulfed all six of his senses as he reached the pre-owned red Tacoma truck he had bought on eBay. With the “Da Dips” vibes all but gone he got in and rolled the car over.

6. Find yourself in the music and get bye

He waited for a song to play from his randomly selected playlist entitled “Drift Away” through the speakers. A list that was made of yellow submarines, crazy diamonds and stairways that lead to some sort of heaven.

The signature alternative strum of a song that spoke of a wonderful wall and a person that could possible save it all for him twanged in.

Rule six always was designed to prevent Ellis from driving his car into oncoming traffic. He was able to lose himself in a world comprised of lyrics from the songs he played. Day dreaming was the only part of life where he was in control of.

Rolling the windows down, a hint of ocean breeze from six streets over snuck around the buildings that blocked his view and found their way to his car. The lyrics kicked in as Ellis celebrated the extra smile life chose to afford him that day. Living so far from work was worth it for a moment like this to him.

At the end of his hourly commute was the antithesis to his dream job but the smell of the ocean and the lyrics were all he could focus on. For that moment the world didn’t seem as shitty as it actually was.

“Cono!! Move that piece of shit gringo.”

The sassy Ecuadorian neighbor he lived next to snapped as she waited for the spot his car greedily consumed. There was no amount of smell or lyrics that could erase the screech her voice generated.

“Maybeeee”

The music refocused his anger.

“That wall better be fucking fantastic.”

{#sicmantitties}